300 Posts and Where Am I Going?
This is my 300th post, which still seems crazy to me. When I started the wordpress.com version of my blog more than three and a half years ago, I’m not sure I really thought much about how long it would last. I know I didn’t think I’d be switching to a self-hosted site just a few months later. Now my life is different in so many ways I never could have imagined back then. But instead of looking back like I did for my 200th post, I thought I’d take a look at where I’m going.
My previous reasons for not pursuing a job
I feel time barreling down on me in a way I haven’t in a long time. I’m feeling frustrated about my next step, what to do with myself and my time. For the past two years, I’ve had a series of things occupying my time. I was planning a five month round the world trip, then I was on that trip, then I was taking an intense German integration course for eight months, then I was sick for a while, then Andy and I were traveling for two months. Now we’re home, and Andy’s back to work with a contract, but I’m feeling a bit lost.
Are you going to get a job soon?
I hear this question a lot lately, and I feel like a slacker when I say no. It’s all too complicated to explain to most people, especially people like my 88 year old neighbor who speaks an almost indecipherable (to me) dialect of German. I do want some source of income, but I’m ok with not making a full time salary like I did when I lived in Atlanta. I just want to do something I enjoy and feel like I’m contributing to our expenses even a little.
Business roadblocks
I’ve had this business idea for a few months, but I keep finding more problems, more roadblocks, more costs. It’s very likely that I won’t be able to start a business, even an online one, in Germany. But starting it in the US has its own complications since I’m not a resident there. There also health insurance complications here since the rules apply differently for self-employed people, which is Andy’s current status. So if I start working, I might have to pay for my own health insurance, whereas now I’m covered on Andy’s. I suddenly see the small amount of money I thought I could make (in dollars) getting paid out in large amounts (in dollars and euros), making my efforts feel futile.
Sorry, I don’t want to be a dishwasher
So if the business idea doesn’t work out, what next? What will I do with my time? How will I earn money? My German isn’t good enough to get hired for most jobs. I don’t want to work in insurance again (my job in the US) and even if I did, my qualifications from the US wouldn’t be enough to get an equivalent job here. Plus if Andy and I are going to continue traveling the way we want to and living our Beyond Vacation idea, I wouldn’t be able to hold a job for more than a few months at a time anyway. My options for a traditional job are extremely limited, and I don’t want to wash dishes.
Writing?
I don’t want blogging to be my career. I enjoy it, but I have no desire to go on rounds of press trips or travel on someone else’s terms for little to no money. I’m currently enrolled in a two week writing seminar (in English) and it’s making me more and more interested in writing outside of my two sites. But I don’t know if that’s a new career path for me, or just an extension of a hobby. Freelance writing isn’t grabbing me at the moment because most of it feels uninspiring and only pays about $25 an article.
Exhausted yet? I’m worn out just trying to write this post. So where am I going? Who knows. I just reread a post I wrote a little over a year ago called Thoughts on One Year of Unemployment, and that, plus the wonderful comments everyone left me, helped me get a little more perspective. I think for now I’ll just keep blogging, keep working on my writing outside of the blogs, and poke at a few ideas to see if any of them will spring to life. And maybe I’ll just start telling my neighbor my job is top secret.
August 1, 2013 @ 10:23 AM
“And maybe I’ll just start telling my neighbor my job is top secret.”
Love it:-)
I’m sure you’ll figure something out Ali. I know it doesn’t bring light to your own questions, but I think a lot of people find themselves in a similar position.
You know I combine my full time job and blogging, but I want to go somewhere, work towards something.
I just don’t know towards what yet.
I have several ideas, but everything is still a bit chaotic and I don’t know if I want certain things because I really want them, or because it would be the logical next (online) step to take.
I’ve been struggling with this for a while now and I think I should maybe create a mindmap or something. Get things on paper…
August 3, 2013 @ 12:27 PM
Thanks Sofie! Yeah, it’s tough. It’s easy to get caught up in the blogging world and the possibilities if offers, but you have to make sure it’s what you really want. I love blogging, but trying to make it my career just isn’t for me. I hope you figure out what direction you want to go in, hopefully we’ll both figure it out soon!
August 1, 2013 @ 3:58 PM
I think it’s great that you’ve been exploring starting a business. Even thought there are roadblocks, you wouldn’t have known about them without looking into it, and you may have wondered “what if…” for months (or years) to come if you hadn’t allowed yourself to check it out. I’ve been working part-time at the university I worked for before Australia since returning to Oz, and now that Gav is here and the two weddings have happened, I plan to continue working 32-hrs per week at the day job while looking into starting a couple of businesses in the next two years. I hope they work out, but I might discover through my research that they won’t. That prospect is a little frightening and almost makes me fearful to start, but I owe it to myself to look into it!
Keep exploring ideas and options. See what doors open and close : -)
August 3, 2013 @ 12:31 PM
Thanks Heather, you’re totally right. As frustrating as it is to think my business idea might not happen, I would’ve always wondered what if? I think it’s great you and Gav are looking into some business ideas of your own. You do need to pursue it if it’s in your head and not let those fears take over too much. I really hope it works out for you!
August 1, 2013 @ 4:15 PM
Thank you for being honest! It’s such a refreshing change of pace to read. I’m in a similar situation – leaving for Spanish Immersion in Central America in 76 days and no idea what I’ll do when I get back. Thanks for making me feel like I’m not the only one out there with that problem and good luck with your decisions!
August 3, 2013 @ 12:33 PM
Thanks Becky, I appreciate that! Trying to figure out your next step in life, no matter what your situation, is almost always difficult. You’re definitely not alone! I hope your Spanish immersion was great, I’d love to improve my Spanish. Good luck to you too, I’m sure you’ll find something!
August 1, 2013 @ 4:53 PM
There are a lot more location independent jobs to do than just blogging and freelance. And you don’t have to start your own business to do them. Is there something you’re passionate about or and industry you’re qualified to work in? Update your resume and get on the LinkedIn job boards.
Otherwise, you also volunteer between traveling. It won’t bring in any income, but would feel pretty rewarding. And you never know, it could lead to a job.
Good luck!
August 3, 2013 @ 12:36 PM
I do get job emails from Linked in, but because my resume is dominated by my former insurance career, everything they send me is insurance or something else in a highly corporate environment. They do send me lots of stuff in Germany, but just from the job titles I know I’m not qualified. But I haven’t spend as much time fixing up my profile as I could, so I might put some work into that over the next few weeks. I definitely want something I can do from wherever. I’ll figure it out one of these days! Thanks!
August 3, 2013 @ 8:44 AM
I can completely understand your dilemma. Sometimes it is hard to motivate yourself to find a job when the return is so little (either monetarily or satisfaction wise), particularly if you have a partner that works, and you are earning little bits and bobs along the way. After one year of travel and blogging, i occasionally receive offers to interview for positions doing what I used to do (tax law) and don’t want to do that, but I could only imagine peoples’ thoughts about me turning down that kind of work. I just don’t want to do it. I want to spend my time in an enjoyable way, and make some money along the way, nothing more. Good luck in your quest!
August 3, 2013 @ 12:40 PM
Thanks Amber! I’m definitely at a point where I don’t want to do just any job just to make some money. You’re right, it does feel weird to be so picky about what kinds of jobs I’ll do, but if we’re able to be picky, we owe it to ourselves to really try to find something that’s a good fit and that’s fulfilling. I’ll keep looking and see what I can come up with. Good luck to you too!
August 3, 2013 @ 5:13 PM
What an open and honest post! Wishing you well! Career changes can be challenging but finding work that you love makes it all worthwhile!
August 4, 2013 @ 12:33 PM
Thanks Mary! I’m sure I’ll figure something out one of these days!
August 3, 2013 @ 11:54 PM
Ali, have you considered a business partnership? Find someone there (or in the US) who’s interested and supportive of your business model and willing to be the front man, then you could work for them with a controlling % of the biz.
As for writing – how about a book? An Anthology of your travels thus far.
Just saying… 😀
August 4, 2013 @ 12:35 PM
That actually sounds even more complicated, and it wouldn’t actually eliminate the problem of having to pay health insurance here. I really don’t see my business turning into something that makes a huge amount of money, so it probably wouldn’t be worth having a partner – that would mean even less money. As for a book….maybe. I’ve been thinking about trying it out, so we’ll see! Thanks Maria!
August 4, 2013 @ 3:31 PM
Tough situation, Ali! I’m interested to hear what your business idea is 😉 However what I really want to say is I understand how important it is to have some sort of goal, but it doesn’t have to be at a job. If you guys are making enough money off Andy’s income, and it pays more to get the health coverage, then you could pursue volunteering roles with your extra time.
August 5, 2013 @ 5:10 PM
Thanks Brooke! I think I probably do need to work more towards goals that aren’t so “job” focused. Andy does earn enough to support us, I just never thought of myself as someone who wouldn’t have a job. It’s a weird feeling. I might email you about the business idea.
August 5, 2013 @ 11:35 PM
Ali! I can so understand how you feel. I am having a bit of an identity crisis at the moment. It’s because we are back in the U.S. (if only for a few months) but everyone is asking- what comes next? And will I get a real job? Blah blah blah. OMG!!!!! I can’t say I have any advice for you except to just do what feels right and shut out the noise of everything else. XO
August 6, 2013 @ 3:47 PM
Thanks Kim! I can’t believe people are still asking you about getting a “real” job when you’re totally planning on hitting the road again at the end of the summer. Most people just don’t understand when you do something outside of the norm. I’m trying really hard to shut out all kinds of noise, hopefully I’ll get better at doing that and then maybe I’ll be able to just hear my own.
August 7, 2013 @ 12:05 AM
Congrats on your 300th post! I’m still figuring it all out too…
August 7, 2013 @ 1:39 PM
Thanks Andrea! I guess most of us are trying to figure it all out. Good to know I’m not alone.
August 7, 2013 @ 11:49 PM
The roadblocks sound frustrating. Is there a neighboring country where you could register a business that might be a little more business-friendly?
Either way, congrats on the 300th post!
August 8, 2013 @ 3:27 PM
Thanks Erik! No, that would be even harder because I have no ties to other countries. I’m sure there’s some way I could get it set up either here or in the US, but since I don’t see it as something that will make tons of money, the money I’d lose to health insurance just isn’t worth it, especially since I’m currently covered with Andy. It’s just a hassle.
August 10, 2013 @ 10:38 PM
Wow! That’s awesome on your 300th post! I’m sure something will work out for you. I would love to make my blog a full-time second career. But I think we’re too young or maybe not popular enough for that. I think yours is though. And who knows, maybe you can turn it into some kind of shop. You have some bureaucracy to go through. Or maybe you can write for an expat magazine or newspaper? They might need a freelance writer and they might pay a little more? 🙂
August 11, 2013 @ 2:58 PM
Thanks Nicole! For me, I think being a full time professional blogger would take the joy out of traveling. It totally works for some people, but I don’t think it’s right for me. I’m definitely starting to explore some more writing options, so who knows. I probably just need to keep playing around with ideas until I hit one that works and feels like a good fit. I’ll get there!
August 11, 2013 @ 12:32 PM
I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up, but I do know that I hate when people lead off conversations with “what do you do?” A job should not define your entire being, you know?
Good post, Ali.
August 11, 2013 @ 3:01 PM
Thanks Steven! I totally agree, I don’t want to be defined by a job, there’s so much more to a person then whatever it is they do to pay the bills.
August 15, 2013 @ 4:43 PM
Hi Ali — I can so relate to your experience. We were supposed to be in China for just one year for my husband’s job, but now it might get extended. So for how long am I supposed to wait in limbo? And I also deal with that pressure from people, when are you going to get a real job? When are you guys going to come back to the US and settle down and start taking life seriously? It’s unfathomable to me that people think our (and your) lifestyle is somehow not taking life seriously. The things I’ve seen and the people I’ve met in this world make it impossible to ever return to what everyone else seems to think is “taking life seriously.” I’ve always defined myself by what I do and taken great pride in how hard I’ve worked for that, but now I’m in a situation that I can’t control and what I have used to define me has been temporarily put on hold. I don’t want to just travel indefinitely or work and live abroad forever, but I don’t want to return to the US just so I can confine myself to someone else’s definition of how I should be living my life. Good luck to you, and I look forward to seeing where you go next, in life and travel.
August 15, 2013 @ 5:07 PM
Ellen, thank you so much for this comment! It’s so nice to know other people know what I’m going through. We certainly don’t all have to have “normal” or traditional jobs. There is so much more out there, so many other ways to live life besides the “normal” and expected way. And why does affect them if you want to live a little differently? You’re right, just because you’re not following the expected path doesn’t mean you’re not taking life seriously. Good luck to you too, I think you’re on the right track to figuring out what’s important to you.
September 14, 2013 @ 3:49 PM
I can so relate. It’s hard enough to figure out what you want to do career-wise in your home country, let alone a foreign one with a different language that is not exactly entrepreneur friendly. If you ever need to talk, I’m here.
September 14, 2013 @ 5:45 PM
Thanks Laurel! Yeah, even Andy still has trouble with deciphering the German when it comes to things like taxes and legal speak. For me, I think part of it is still having to adjust my expectations. I’m getting there! I appreciate the offer, I’ll keep you in mind, thanks!